Udhume ngani

Before we get to troll business, can we please just discuss the pre-SONA last night? You know, the show that took place just as our president was about to address the nation on the state that our country is in. I was never ready for the amount of trolling that the EFF displayed shem. Can we please award The EFF's CIC the title of Troll King?  More interesting, was how Musi Maimane of the DA took over the trolling in a more mature (read sexy thle, I mean he can gerrrrrrit from me that dude shem). It almost seemed like the 2 parties; EFF & the DA; are in this together. Could it be that they had discussed how the showdown would go down before coming the event last night? I mean it all seemed like the DA was on que.

My claim to fame

On to local troll business, can we discuss and share what we are well known and wish to be remembered for today. Mina, in these streets I am well famous for my dark and fat fingers. For being pre-engaged by a Ben10 with a "less than 2K" ring. However, what I wanna be remembered for is my good heart and beautiful soul.

What are "famous" for and what do you wish to be remembered for?

by Queen Troll

The kiss that started it all

The kiss that started it all

The kiss, the kiss started it all.

 And you held my hands against the wall, I could feel you.

I felt the touch that went down my spine;

 I felt the kiss that kissed beyond my lips... The kiss that started it all.

You held my chin up and said you loved me; you kissed my forehead and said you cared. I believe it; I can see it through your eyes. Then we went back to that kiss, the kiss that started it all.

 

That kiss oh damn, that kiss. I felt the cloud under my feet, I felt my body as music orchestrated by your touch and moving to every note you wanted it to.

I dropped down on my knees not just to worship that sacred place you reserve for me but also to give you just half the measure of the pleasure I felt. I felt your strong hand on my head and the long soft moans of my name...

You loved it, it showed me you did.

 

And when u pulled me up back to those lips and gave me that kiss, the kiss that started it all. I couldn't help but drop that LBD (little black dress) and bare myself to u... You enjoyed the view; it told me you did... You distributed that kiss, all the way down my neck, breast and belly.... You took all your time and made sure every cell in my body knew who was in control. I moaned in all kinds of melodies... And after what seem like an eternity you brought back that kiss to my lips, that kiss that started it all.

 

As our bodies touched I felt the chills, your chest on my breast, your belly on mine and your hips on mine, nothing could separate us now... We were glued by the bond of love, lust and all other shit...

 

You whispered, “Baby, make love to me...” that was music to my ears, that was the button I had waited to be pressed... I expressed myself, in a way only I could understand at that time... The kisses were deeper and slower, the strokes were longer and slower, the moans were louder and more uncontrollable, I screamed you name... It was the only name or word that made sense... The only name that was taking me to a place so close to heaven...  I could feel the big O building up... The pace was much faster; the hand that was holding me so lovingly was spanking my ass... The words that were “make love to me”, turned to, “Fuck me now”... And DAMN... I was loving it... I could no longer hold myself... I screamed, I was shaking... I was.... Oh SHIT

 

I woke up... It was all a dream!!!

You turned from your side of the bed and gave me that kiss, the kiss that started it all.  

 

 

by Lovechild

Your Digital Foot Print

I recently did an assignment on digital footprint for one of my projects for my honors degree, and we were paired in groups of two, to google each other and give a presentation of our findings of what we found and if we would recruit the person after a job description we were told to look out for.

 A digital footprint is the word used to describe the trail, traces or "footprints" that people leave online.

 Is your digital foot print a clear image of who you are?

Would recruiters in your line of work view you a person they would like to have in their organisation?

Your digital foot print is a permanent print you leave online. How can manage this;

1. Use Privacy Settings

2. Keep A List Of Accounts (Only keep active the ones you use)

3. Don’t Overshare (keep your life private to those close to you)

4. Use A Password Keeper (Keep your security passwords word unpredictable and safe)

5. Google Yourself (Check what information about you is available online, potential recruiter are doing it)

6. Monitor Linking Accounts

7. Use a Secondary Email (Whether you’re communicating with someone new, or signing up for a new social media platform, it can be useful to have a secondary email address)

8. Sending Is Like Publishing–Forever (Every time you send a message, post, or picture, you’re publishing it the same way CNN does a news story. And the internet never forgets)

9. Understand That Searches Are Social (It’s not always information that you choose to make public. Remember: Privacy controls or no privacy controls, Facebook (Just to name a few) still records and uses every scrap of information it gets to better determine its users’ marketing demographics)

Let’s keep our digital foot print clean!

 

By Lufuno

 

 

Cheapskate guide to saving costs

With the amount of debt that I found myself in for the past 2 years, I have had to find ways to save money before I find myself doing night shift at Oxford Street. Joburg is such a harsh place to live shem especially if you are just a normal working class with no other financial support structure.

Here are some of the ways that can help save a cent here and a buck there.

• Shower at the gym or even the spa after a treatment. Instead of taking a shower before going to the gym or even after the gym when you get home, take the shower at the gym. This will save you on the water bill.
• Cook enough food that you have leftovers to store in the freezer so next time you want the same thing you just heat it up an voila, you have a meal in minute. This will save you money and time spent on cooking, allowing family bonding time.
• Walk to some places. There is no need to drive everywhere. A 5km walk here and and 1km walk there will help keep you fitter and save you on fuel, car repairs and you can avoid unnecessary hassles such as traffic etc
• Take a doggy bag when out at restaurants. I don't remember how often I have been to a restaurant, ordered a meal and not finished it just to have it taken back to the kitchen and chucked away but still pay for the full meal. So, now I ask for it. This becomes lunch at work and I save on skhafthin.
• Attend & eat at functions you get invited to. Most functions such as weddings have catering which means you get to eat. You spend most of your day at the damn thing anyway so really why not just eat there all day. Don't be ashamed, the host had their guest's tummy in mind when they organised the catering. Own that plate.
• Carpool to events. When going on an outing with others, ask if they don't mind an extra passenger. Offer to be the designated driver too to ease their discomfort. 
• DIY! somethings don't need to be outsourced. Laundry for example doesn't really really have to be done ko laundromat. use your own hands.
• Don't go overboard when people visit by just dishing out snacks and drinks left, right and centre. I always ask. I will go "would you like some peanuts?" Most of the time the guest will say no. This just means, I now haven't wasted food unnecessarily by just giving someone who isn't hungry.
• Buy at sales. I am a bargain hunter. I have noticed trends last for more than one season. So the summer dress that is in now will still be in next summer. so when the end of season sale comes I can buy and keep it for next summer.

There are more tricks but I will keep it descent for now.

What do you ladies recommend?

by Queen Troll

Happy Monday

Welcome to the new week, friends.

Oh what a quiet one from my side. Nothing exciting happened to me this weekend.

I was so anti-social, I cancelled a book club meeting on Saturday morning. However, neglected to cancel a lunch with one of my other girls so I had to drag myself out the house to go meet her. At least lunch was free kiiiiiii. Got home to some serious loadshedding. We have had no power since Saturday and I am ashamed to say I am wearing leggings and a vest at work today. If it wasn't for my 18year old body, I swear my 24year old soul would be looking like a drag queen right now. On the brighter side, at least I read a book instead of watching TLC all day.

What did you ladies get up to?

Queen Troll