Happy Birthday TOLAH

Wiser and bigger

**********singing************

 Started from the bhoggard now we are here.
Look at us now, we doing great yoh, we doing great!!!!!
Mama we made it, a year later we are sending shout outs from  the mini mansion. Happy belated, TOLAH we made it!!!!

Speech:
As we celebrate TOLAH's first year, I would like to take this opportunity to send a sharraaaat to all the trolls & those who closed doors to their homes and pushed us to open our own. Not only do we religiously meet here to tackle issues that bother us, whatsapp profile pics, dating standards and the 5oils but we have also made a proper mark in the real world via TOLAH Cares. I am constantly having to drive to and from places collecting and delivering items, some of which get declared on the blog but others I just donate to allocated projects as needed. We are even responsibly for getting one of South Africa's biggest hygiene companies to adopt a home that we discovered was in need of sponsorship. Thanks very much for your giving hearts.

I have too much to say but I bet you do too. Sooo, I rate we all sit down for a cuppa and reminisce.

Cheers to another year of sharing, giving, FDS, real talk, feelings catching and family stuff.

Yours with eyes full of tears, Queen Troll

When is it disrespect....

So many time we feel we are disrespected by people around us. Be it family, friends, lovers, colleagues, service provider or even our children. But where do we draw the line where we too are not enabling it or doing the same toward a person close to us? There is a thin line between feeling disrespected and being selfish, rude or not understanding.

Definition: acting rude, impolite, and offensive.

We all find something important to us, and wish people around us could understand and treat us with courtesy and sensitivity. This making disrespect relative and unique to every individual.

Selfishness can form a huge role to a person being disrespectful to others. You will never understand a persons emotional and personality once you are selfish, therefore you will be selfish in your interaction with them, which may come across as rude and disrespectful toward them.

We often talk about the tone on the blog, and it plays a huge role in showing respect. The tone in your writing, your voice and the way you convey a message should be in a way that does not offend the next person. 

Disrespect is necessary and inevitable, rather than holding the double standard whereby your disrespect is just enlightened, and other people’s is simply sinful. We’re born judgmental, approving and  disrespectful at everything bitter. But some of what’s bitter, turns out to be better than it tastes, so we should get beyond condemning everything that doesn’t immediately appeal to us. We need to learn to put ourselves in the shoes of the next person before we project our views, and learn to do so in a way that does not belittle the other.

Well, well, well...

"Don’t fight with a pig, you’ll just get dirty and the pig likes it,” is a great reminder that if you can walk away, you should. Walking away from someone you disrespect is often the most respectful way to show your disrespect, not that it will necessarily be taken that way. Not all battles are worth your fight, because at the end of the day, you have not walked in their shoes and they yours.

With this said, I came across this, "When you humor people, you’re disrespectfully treating them as incapable of handling your disrespect.  When you convey your disrespect, you’re honoring their capacity to live and learn from feedback. Saying or not saying what you think can be taken as both disrespectful and respectful, as is evident in the way people put us in a double bind demanding that we respect them by being honest with them, and yet also demanding that we respect them by being diplomatic with them.  Respect their ambivalence and face into the tough judgment call we all have to make, truth or care, should you speak your truth or just express care by shutting up."

Images by: Google image

The moment you fail to acknowledge the other persons feelings and position, you are being selfish and disrespectful. Always find a way to get your point across without disrespecting the person you are engaging with by putting yourself in their shoes. - By me

• Do to others as you would have them do to you. Luke 6:31

• So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12

By Lufuno 
xoxoxoxoxoxo

#TOLAHCHEFS12: For The Love Of A Great Braai

This week I give you three options that you can play around with either as you play the host or to carry with when you go to one of those bring and braai’s – I have never understood that concept though, why invite me then ask me to bring my food as well? Let me not make this about me though…. Happy cooking…

Bacon, Veg & Feta Salad

 Ingredients:                                                             1 bag lettuce   

2 ripe avocados, cut into chunks 
2/3 cup of fresh green peas  
200 g danish feta, crumbled into large chunk
1 cup of croutons   
200 g bit of bacon, fried until crisp

For the dressing:                                                      2 heaped tablespoons mayonnaise  

2 heaped tablespoons Greek yoghurt (or plain)

1 generous teaspoon Dijon mustard  

juice of 1/2 lemon 

1/2 teaspoon dried tarragon

1 handful chopped flat-leaf parsley    

1 handful chopped chives

Method:

Arrange all the ingredients in the listed order on a large serving platter. End off with the bacon, then drizzle with green goddess dressing just before serving. For the dressing: Mix all the ingredients together in a cup with a fork – this makes quite a thick dressing. Add a teaspoon of warm water if dressing is too thick. Serve extra dressing on the side.

Mediterranean Lamb Skewers

Ingredients:

1kg lamb, deboned and cubed              
1 Tbsp oil or butter

1 onion, chopped    
2 cloves grated garlic   
½ tsp curry powder   
¼ tsp turmeric  
1 cups brown vinegar                 
225 g tin smooth apricot jam      
pinch of salt      
4 to 8 fresh bay leaves, torn  
dried apricots and pieces of onion and peppers (optional)

*You will also need skewers

Method:

To make the marinade, sauté the onions in oil, add the garlic, ginger, curry powder and turmeric, and fry for another two minutes. Stir in the vinegar, jam and salt and heat until boiling. Remove from the heat and let the marinade cool down to room temperature. Place the meat into a marinating bowl, add the torn bay leaves and pour the cooled-down marinade over the meat. Toss thoroughly and make sure you coat all the meat. Cover overnight. Add dried apricots and pieces of onion and peppers between the meat cubes when you are skewering. Braai for about 10 minutes over hot coals, turning a few times.

Ostrich Burgers

 Ingredients:                                                                                                     

2 Onions                                                             

a glass of Cape Ruby Port 
500 g packet of four ostrich patties 
2 hamburger rolls   
100 g grated cheddar cheese, grated lettuce    tomato slices                                                                                    

Method:

Sauté the onions and add the Port. Reduce until the sauce thickens and set aside. Rub patties with olive oil and braai for six to eight minutes over hot coals until .Assemble the burger: bottom half of roll, lettuce, tomato slices, ostrich patty, grated cheese, another patty, onions, sauce, top half of roll. Keep it together by inserting a sosatie stick or similar through the middle from top to bottom.

Until Next time,

La Petit Chef

Credit: theprettyblog.com; getwaway.co.za 

Guess Who ????

1. Initials : TM
2. Date of birth: 01 Mar 1990
3. Describe yourself in 3 words : Controlling, Perfectionist and Impatient
4. What is the most important thing in your life right now? My family, without a doubt.
5. What quirky habits do you have? Ugh I sometime find myself picking my nose, especially while driving.
6. One thing that TOLAH’s don’t know? I'm very strict and always the voice of reason, to a point that everyone in my family including the elders tip toe around me.
7. What are your fondest childhood memory? Growing up with my aunt. I remember intentionally missing my school transport so I can stay home and my aunt’s boyfriend would take me to school on his bicycle. Needless to say he’s still my bestfriend…the grandfather I never had.
8. What’s the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you? When my varsity boyfriend was stick macking, he came to my place once and I had post-nasal drip (this is basically when excessive mucus is produced and starts dripping from the back of your nose and starts accumulating in your throat…coughing this out can be real yuck). So as we were chilling I’d excuse myself, run outside and cough it out. This went pretty well until I was walking him out and the mucus started choking me…I was losing my breath and was quarter to fainting, so I just let it out. It was the most disgusting thing ever and he kept reminding me of that incident 2 years later.
9. What’s the one thing you used to do as a child that you wish you could still do? Read a lot. I made my first friend in Grade 5, so before then  books were all I had. I was a very socially awkward child.
10. What great lesson would you teach your children? To always be respectful  and to take responsibility of all their choices. 
11. Success is? Living your dream.
12.  Ultimate goal in life? To make a difference in someone’s life. Life has been very kind to me and I can only dream of extending the same opportunity to those that aren’t as fortunate.
13. If you could do anything you wanted right now, what would it be? Resign and focus on my business and my NGO.
14. What was the first thing you bought with your own money? I got my first paycheck In first year, working  for the University. I took my little sister shopping and got me some homeware.
15. Describe your ideal partner: He must be patient, he must be understanding as I can be a bit of a tough cookie to deal with, his fashion must be on fleek  and be a hustler of note. Fortunately for me, my current partner is all these and more.
16. What is the one thing do you think that the sexes should know about each other ? That we’re only human, we tend to expect the world out of each other which is a bit unfair.
17. Given the opportunity what would you change about your self and why? I don’t love easily and for that reason I write off people without a flinch.
18. What is the one thing you want to experience before you die? Bungee on Vic falls, to conquer my extreme hydrophobia.
19. One blogger who you would want to meet and why? Lephutsi. She strikes me as a very nice young lady with tact, I love how she doesn’t even need to try hard…it’s just in her.
20. Best thing of being part of the TOLAH family? I love the immense wisdom that lives in these streets and  ofcoz the information sharing, there’s literally GPS to everything you can think of.

Guess who will be announced at midday 

Weekend News

Argh back to work again, blehr...

If you are reading this on Sunday evening I am hoping you are at least a clever black interested in astronomy and stuff.  You can witness a double whammy being a full moon and lunar eclipse all at once in the early hours of Monday morning, around 3:30 to 4:15 am to be precise so make your 3am prayer just a tad quicker and go watch God show off. Well actually the eclipse is caused by the sun moving past the darkest part of the earth ( where Satan lives, according to my limited knowledge based on non-written literature but my wild imagination) and the HUGE orange moon is caused by it moving a lot closer to the earth. Those who manage to catch it, please come share, it would be nice to talk about anything other than amadoda for a change.

The situation expected early hours of Monday

Mbuso Mandela, the grandson of late former South African president, Nelson Mandela, has reportedly sent a video to the young girl he's being accused of having raped at a Johannesburg restaurant earlier this year. It is said that he sent the video via snapchat; a social network that allows people to converse by sending images, videos and messages and said communication gets deleted after a certain period of time to avoid "archives OOMFS" using the convos for blackmails etc. Part of his bail conditions was that he may not be in contact with the young defendant. It looks like he might have to go back to jail for not adhering to his bail conditions.

Mbuso Mandela: wants to go to prison just like Grand Daddy, only his reasons aren't as honorable

Haaaahaaaaaaa guys, how dodge is Bucie though? Lol, I've heard of faking it until you make it but this? She was featured on J-Something's cooking show; where a person supposedly asks J-Something to come to their house and he can help them cook hearty but easy to make meals etc etc. Hawu, u girl yena she asked one of her friends who stays at a fancier address in Bryanston to let her do the shoot at her house. Why heh? Reminds me of when Kelly Khumalo had to shoot her reality show from her agent's house instead of her own. Kanti where do these girl celebs stay? Why are they embarrassed?  I mean it can't be thaaaaaat bad, even that Disk Diva click allow cameras into her shabby home. Ke Bo Grandee and this address business, now people from Westoneria are sceptical about showing their homes on TV.

Bucie and J-Something whilst recording the show at the "rent-a-location"

Who's watching the RWC? I have tried and honestly I have failed dismally to understand it. I am no fan of men in tight shorts running around looking all agresive,  all I know is the Boys have redeemed themselves after that humiliating loss against Japan. They won 46-6 against Samoa over the weekend . I  swear some of these countries only show up when there are international sporting events just to lose in the group stages and go back to their quiet submissive lives. Well done to the boks!

Bokke. Habashwe!

#IAmStellenbosch trended over the weekend. Needless to say, it got tweeps utterly disgusted if not making fun of some of the students. From where I was sitting, I am not sure if the entire hashtag bore the intended results as when discussed around the tables. Here are some of the images. smh!

Really, guys? This is wrong.

She's too kind

Could it be a drink, perhaps?

This girl.... WTF

Nje! They must know!

Then there was this one, did anyone at least send him the images?

My niggah!

Images curtosy of Google. 

Posted by Nana

TOLAH CARES: Mamdladla and Son

On Wednesday I was lucky enough to meet the most beautifullest 10 year old boy I'd ever seen. So lively, so loving, so gorgeous and just wanting hugs and kisses. Accompanied by his mommy into the ward at a Johannesburg hospital , I met our hero, Mamdladla's son. I vote for him to be Try's future unclebae.

You trolls will remember her heartbreaking pleas for prayer after her son got so ill that he had to be admitted into hospital. Troll gogo organized a care group to push midnight prayers and put together a few items to help our baby's stay in the hospital a pleasant one.

As we all know, I GET ASKED TO DO EVERYTHING. & so it was that I got tasked by the TOLAH angels to make his day. In the end, I managed to get a few play station games, colouring in books, colouring in pencils and khokhis for him & a card I forgot to write in, I had to say the message to him verbally. Of course we are also about MBA's and doctorates here at home so I got a book for the mommy too just to keep the dumpness at bay. I also managed to act girly and shop around for some flowers too, couldn't get water to go with the flowers in fear that she might just start gulping it away #TolahStandardsSometimes, smh! Thanks very much to those who contributed. From the bottom of my sincerity, I am grateful you are part of this family. You make blogging at this stockvel worth all the trouble. I love your givingness  (someone has to make up these words)

I will let Mamdladla update you about the good progress when she gets a chance to pop in, I'm not hundreds about how much I'm allowed to share at this stage but fear not, the Lord showed off in this situation.

Now that we've got the good stuff out of the way, let's TOLAHPIC. I wanna post my #RelationshipGoals #ThisCouldBeYouButUjolaNoSkrufu #LoveIsThisPic #NinyileNgobaKujolaMina

Somebody lead and I will follow at 10am. #Habashwe #ThisArticleHasNoPics? #ThanksAishaEvenThoughYouDidntPostThis

By Queen Troll

NYFW Wrapup

New York Fashion Week, one of the biggest fashion showcases took place last week. With over 70 shows, the streets of midtown and downtown New York were abuzz as fashion mavens from all over the world ran from one to show to the other to catch the latest work of designers. The biggest trends were saturated colors, bright hues, a lot of tassled ruffles, fringe and thankfully flowy feminine gowns.

Most of the designers brought their A-game, with outstanding presentations and eye-catching pieces. As models sauntered the runway, every piece was under scrutiny, taking note of the intricate details and overall silhouette of the piece.

Here are my favorites:

Marchesa RTW Spring 2016 - this was absolute favorite. The theme was botanical dream, petals, plumage and tule. I am most certain that celebrities will don these gowns for next year's award season.

Details....

Michael Castello Spring RTW 2016 - luxurious and colourful frocks that show a lot of leg. Numerous IG boutiques are busy making knockoffs of these I'm sure because they are every baddies dream.

Castello

 
Jason Wu Spring RTW 2016 - I particularly loved the ruffled in textured waves fabric

Jason Wu

Jason Wu

  Monique Lhuiller Spring RTW 2016
 

Monique

Givenchy Spring RTW 2016 - Ricardo Tiscci made his NYFW debut, presenting lingerie referenced garments, laced with embellishments, striking ornaments with edginess. The models faces were decorated with intriguing jewellery.

Givenchy

 Diane von Fursternberg Spring/Summer 2016
 

DVF

Carolina Herrera Spring RTW 2016 - For the feminine and elegant lady

Carolina

     Reem Accra Spring RTW 2016 - Colourful oriental style and print match

Reem Accra

Least favorites....
DKNY Spring RTW 2016 - the new creative directors, Public School, made their new debut. It was lacklustre for a huge brand like DKNY I'm afraid to say. The minimalism was dull and boring.

DKNY

Jeremy Scott Spring RTW 2016 - although his work stood out because of the bold colors, prints and plastic materials he incorporated, his work is too pop and cartoonish for my liking, not very different from the Barbie themed presentation he made earlier this year for Moschino.

Jeremy Scott

Zimmerman Spring RTW 2016 - the mesh Victorian era inspired pieces with sandy colours were a dull combination

Zimmerman

Yeezy Season 2 - there is no doubt that Kanye West is a creative genius, but in the fashion designing world he is a novice. He is still experimenting with nudes, fabric cutouts, baggy hoodies and hippie wear. The presentation was artistic, very Kanye-sque with military style walk-ins. Although his designs were not received well by the general public, Kanye brushed the critics off..

Yeezy

There was diversity as well, plus size ladies worked the runway!!
Ashley Graham x Addington Elle

Project Runway

Also ending the NYFW with a bang was Betta Ditto for Marc Jacobs

What's a fashion show without outrageous outfits...
Thom Browne

The Blonds

Till next year February...
By @thespian_dame